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It’s just me today. Merry Christmas! I’m flying solo for this holiday episode of the podcast. I wanted to take a moment to share some of my favorite podcasts from this past season and point you in their direction if you’re interested in specific topics. Plus, I’ll fill you in on my plans moving forward. Hang tight, and let’s get into it!

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  • [00:00:37] Reflection
  • [00:04:18] Interactions
  • [00:09:00] Time with Children
  • [00:10:04] Holidays
  • [00:14:45] Protein
  • [00:19:01] Calories, Metabolic Function, and Microbiome
  • [00:21:26] Proactive with our Health
  • [00:27:08] Going into 2024

    Show Transcript:

     [00:00:37] Gabby Reece: I think all of us use this time of the year to just build upon, reflect. And I always feel like we have a little extra juice moving into the new year about this is what I’m going to do. And, I’m certainly no different. And I want to start with, I just got off an interview talking about certain attachment styles and it got me thinking about how we all have our own stuff.

    And from, childhood, whether it was conscious or subconscious and things that have been imprinted on us, the way our nervous system responds, there’s just a lot of things. And from the outside looking in, it’s Okay. I celebrated my 26th wedding anniversary this year. I have three kids that, they’re doing okay.

    And I want you to know that it’s the constant process of trying to improve and figure things out. And I don’t mean self-improvement, biohacking, measuring. I’m talking about the stuff deep inside. And that’s just. It’s going to be the continued attitude in which I go into the new year, which is to really take a look at my own stuff and figure out ways that I can move that, identify those things, those reactions, those impulses, those patterns, and continue to try to move those out so that I can live more freely, just more making choices from the place of desire and want and curiosity versus fear.

    What, whatever the million things that we do, because that’s our continued homework. So, let’s just start there. I’m going to keep working on my own bullshit. Let’s just say, cause it’s always, Oh my gosh, it’s great. It’s exciting. It’s never ending. And I was just talking to Jen who I work with, who is works on this podcast has been my friend for 30 years.

    I was like, what do you want me to talk about on this podcast? And she was sharing that I think given, especially the world we’re in now, wars and a lot of yelling and people feels very combative, at least in the digital world. And then obviously on the world stage, there are really very serious things going on.

    And she said, What it makes her feel like when she has positive interactions with people throughout the day and we certainly can’t control their people But we definitely can control ourselves I went to store the other day with one of my daughters and I’m busy like all of you and I ordered ahead and you know you just pull up you put your space number in and then they come out and I got out of the car and greeted The young man who was putting the stuff in my car and I always address people, sir, or ma’am at work.

    Okay. That’s for another time. And I was like, Hey, sir, how are you? How’s your day going? And he’s Oh, okay. And I helped him load the stuff in the back of the car. And my daughter’s like, why did you get out? The whole point is like you drive up and I said, because for me to spend 30 seconds to go out and acknowledge another human being and ask them how their day is, especially somebody who’s.

    Working really hard and maybe not the most fun job in the world. It takes nothing on my part and maybe I could participate in being just a better part of this person’s day and that’s what Jen had said. She was like, when I drive and someone like waves me in and lets me in. She’s this makes me feel really good. And going into the new year. If you don’t already do it, I simply invite you to be a part. Whenever you get the chance, big or small, these don’t have to be rebel, revolutionizing acts, a simple hello, a simple allowing someone to go first taking their cart back as you’re going into the market.

    [00:04:18] Gabby Reece: I think that everybody feels this way and the more we can have those interactions that when the stuff that is. Truly out of our control, right? Like right now, this war in Israel is not in my control so I can have compassion and there is nuance around this topic that I want to keep learning and listening and simultaneously parallel pathing the things I’m in control of my everyday life, how I can show up for my partner, my friends, my kids.

    And I also think we’re, it’s confusing, right? There’s a lot of suffering. We see it. And then how can I experience joy and happiness in my day to day life? And we can feel guilty for that. We can feel shamed for that. And I understand the impulse, but if it’s not in your control. So, when something comes up where you can donate or give or be of service that is in your control, take that opportunity.

    But if sometimes it’s just a daily practice of simply being as kind as you can with every person you’re interacting, I don’t think we give that enough value. We think it’s always has to be monumental. And I don’t think that’s really the case. I think there’s more opportunities each day than the monumental one. And so, I, I just want to encourage you remind you and I heard something that Laird shared with me that’s a gentleman said guru shared. And he said, and I put this on a podcast with Elijah for my counter talks, but the most irresponsible thing we could do in our life is to be depressed.

    Now, having said that, are there people who suffer from anxiety and depression clinically? For sure. Of course. However, when we can take the approach that the most responsible thing we could do. Is to play is to show that our life is a gift and that by playing, we’re showing that we’re enjoying it and doing it. I have a very difficult time with this. And so I just want to remind you that simultaneously to acknowledging that there is great suffering in the world, what is in your control and that’s on us and just to invite you that if you can be joyous and create joy for others, whenever that’s a pretty great start.

    So, I will start with that. I’m going to recommit to this idea going into the new year, as far as a strategy for myself care and fitness, I’m pretty good at this, but I’ll just highlight the things that I’m doing that I’ll try to continue to adhere to that seem to be pretty supportive. One is community. I’ve tried to spend quality time with the people that I am close to, because even though. Life is busy and we’re all, all over the place. Being connected to my children. I sit every morning with Laird when he’s in town or I’m in town, which is often. And we just have 15 to 30 minutes. I get up a little earlier and he’s up before me.

    And we just sit together and have, share coffee and share conversation. And that’s how I start my day because I have that opportunity. If you have somebody maybe that you’re with, if you got up 10 minutes earlier just to hang out with them. And by the way, I wake up very differently than Laird. I don’t wake up like, yeah, let’s get it.

    He wakes up when his feet hit the ground. He’s ready to take on. He talks louder than I do. I’m like, whoa. But I will say it’s, it really over time adds to the feeling of connection and checking in with somebody. And in that moment, maybe we’ll talk about our kids, but maybe we won’t. And we do have work and businesses together.

    Sometimes we talk about it, but usually it’s just a place to connect as to human beings. And that really has been a supportive practice. If you have children, I will say, and you’ll hear this over and over driving in the car. That time in the car. They really are talkative. They share their day, how their relationships with their friends are going, what happened on a sports team, if they were mean, if someone was mean to them, just their overview.

    And I’ve learned to take this time because I’m going to be out of it soon. To just listen. I try not to fix everyone’s problems in that time. I do it in my mind, but I don’t say it to them because I want them to share their lives with me. And you can do that even, with someone you’re with a friend or a partner.

    It’s like using that time in the car, not necessarily to always listen to something, even music or a podcast, but just to visit and stay connected. And we live in a world that’s. There’s a lot of access, right? I have a million things I’m trying to learn. I have books I want to listen to. I have podcasts that I love.

    [00:09:21] Gabby Reece: And even just some cool music, but sometimes just that quiet, even when I’m by myself is really powerful because it’s right it’s retuning into them or getting that space. My friend Becky was sharing that lately she’s been driving alone quietly because she’s trying to hear her voice. of Hey, what, what’s next, what do I want to do? Cause it’s in there. But if we can create that quiet to keep tapping into it, I think it gives us a better chance to create a roadmap that will lead us based on, decisions of what we’re doing to a place that reflects, who we are and maybe, and what we want. So, I’ll continue to do that.

    [00:10:04] Gabby Reece: The holidays. I love gathering and I love the gift of the holiday but, the theater around the holiday. I’m not great with. So, I will continue to try to be more joyous around all of that because I don’t care. I’ll be honest with you. Christmas tree is beautiful, but at the end, I just care about the people.

    I really don’t care about the theater. However, I do have a family. They love it. And now that my kids are bigger, playing Santa was fun, but now that they’re bigger, I’m like, okay, let’s just eat together. But I’m still going to participate in the theater because it seems to make them happy at times.

    I can remember feeling like, Oh, I just have to get through this time. And I have a kid who has a birthday on the first. So, it was like, okay, if I can just get over the finish line, like put Christmas on, get through new year’s, put a party on, I’m good. And so, I’m trying really hard not to do that quite as much, but just enjoying the chaos.

    That is the holidays and as far as my care, my food, my sleep, my movement, I know if you live in a colder place. It is harder. I totally honor that. However, it’s not making the holiday start when Thanksgiving started. It’s okay, there’s Thanksgiving Day. Now I go back to my routine to the best of my ability.

    And then it’s Christmas day. So yeah, great. You’re eating, who knows what kind of weird, peppermint bark at six 30 in the morning on Christmas day. Great. Do it. Who cares? But It’s not just foregoing everything. So, when the nights that you can still get back to sleep, great. If you have kind of office celebrations and things, it doesn’t have to be, drink a ton of alcohol each time. Pick the one with the people that’s the most fun for you that you do want to celebrate. Because, it’s all that drinking, all the mindless eating. It really catches up with us. So, I’m going to continue with my regular schedule. Not perfect. Not on Christmas day, but I will continue my training and trying to get to bed when I can.

    The big thing for me is separating dinner from my bedtime. If you can do it now, listen, if you’re having a big blowout with 30 people from your family and that’s bad ass and you’re eating at eight and going till 1030 and talking and doing that fantastic that is worth it, that quality connection time. But otherwise I have found what really helps me maintain things besides eating real food. Not a big surprise is how early can I eat? to separate from my sleep, because not only is my sleep better, but if you want to talk about body composition, I just love using that term, weight management, weight loss, whatever we’re calling it.

    This is really helpful. There’s no reason we need a snack at 10 o’clock at night, people. I just think get it. In lieu of replace it with something, go get some water. Read a book because that always knocks everybody out. We don’t need a snack at 10. We’re bored and that will kick your butt in a whole and interesting way. So, I adhere to best practices that I do during the year and I try to keep it as close to that during the holiday. And again, I do honor that when it’s cold out, it’s like, who wants to go for a walk? I think just, stationary, but for 20 minutes, go on, every minute on the zeros sprint for 20 seconds.

    It all accumulates. In your favor. So, it doesn’t have to be death defying and hours long and brutal. It just has to be strategic and consistent. So, if you can do that, if you do for example, stationary bike, 20 minutes, every time it’s a zero you sprint for 15 or 20 seconds, genuinely. Okay. Spin great. Oh, zeros. Here we go again. All these things I think really help us out. As far as the vitamins I’m taking, if I’m traveling, I will boost up on my D. If I feel a cold coming on a trick I’ve been doing from a, my friend has taught me is I will take 30, 000. I’m not a doctor.

    I’m not telling you what to do. I’m sharing what I’m doing is I will take 30, 000. I use of D and then I won’t take it. For about 10 days. So, if I feel, especially, you get run down, you’re eating sugar, you’re in cold weather, it comes, I do my D, my B12, my multi magnesium. And I am I forget a lot of my supplements. So I am, I’m doing my magnesium and then. Occasionally if I need, more for sleep, I will use a THC gummy or something like that. That’s for sleep. I take it. 30 minutes, an hour before sleep. And that does seem to help, but the magnesium is really helpful.

    [00:14:45] Gabby Reece: And then protein I have learned over and whether you’re male or female, but especially females, the importance of getting enough protein, 35 grams at a meal, if you can get the first and last meal and when those great job, and it’s per ideal body weight. Kilogram. It’s impossible. I weigh 180 pounds. I’m not eating 180 grams of protein. So, I don’t even bother worrying about that. I’m missing it. I’m just trying to be aware and conscious and do the best I can. Okay. So, I really think real food is the best. At times I will supplement with a protein powder. But just keep trying really trying, especially during the

    They always say we need more protein females; men need more fiber and just to keep seeing if you can get that movement in time under tension. It’s Just keeps trying. That’s all we can do. I started walking. I love knees over toes, Ben Patrick, and I have his program, but sometimes I’ll just literally go on my treadmill, walk backwards on it and have to carry a one dumbbell so I can hold on with the other and then switch it from one side to the other to try to make it a little harder.

    So just get creative and have a little bit of fun with it on the meat side. I know we’re all trying to get better, higher quality meat. I will share brands. I don’t work with them, but I do order from them. Force of nature. I love them. I did an interview with their CEO. I, they have lots of different types of meat that, so you can do ground, you can do other things that’s how already you’re cooking.

    It’s not gamey. Really high quality. They’ll mail it right to your door. And Maui Nui Venison. Again, I do not work with these companies, but this is what we order for our house. If we’re looking for those best practices where we’re trying to get high quality meat. So, Maui Nui is really good.

    And again, it’s not gamey. They’ll mail it to you. And they, I think they do a great job of their business practices. So those are some ways. That I’m doing it. I go to the farmer’s market. One of my daughters actually goes now that’s one thing cool about your kids get older. So just trying to get that produce, every two or three days if it’s reasonable. If that’s too crazy, just do the best you can. And, again, plan it out. What are we eating? Try to gather when you can. If you have a roommate, try to, I know it’s hard to cook for one person. So, if you’re solo, then cook a big thing that you like and then great. Now you have it for three or four days.

    So, I just want to remind you that these little things all accumulate. And so maybe that makes it easier in a, in another way. Mapping out the new year, I am going to be adding more long movement. So long cardio, I really have gotten away from that. I broke my toe about two and a half months ago, and then I just watched my cardio fall off.

    So, I think I’m going to use this to get outside more. Go on hikes. I know I can’t say I’m saying that word, but just implementing a little more of that. I’m consistent with my resistance training and pool. So, with my sauna, but just trying to make sure I’m on that a little more. So, I round out my practice. And then I want to share Some of the shows that I think I’d love to highlight and share with you So happiness and obviously we know that’s something you just feel throughout your day. It’s not a place we land on no matter what you’re seeing Online, it’s just something that flows in and out and I did an interview with Robert Waldinger on happiness and what it really comes down to on the Harvard study, it’s connection.

    So we spent a lot of time working and chasing and trying to, either create an identity, live by an identity, accumulate wealth, whatever that is, but the importance of not a ton of people, just a few good people that you know, you could call if something happens. So, I just want to remind you that in this show, all the conversations I have, whether it’s about.

    [00:19:01] Gabby Reece: It’s all about calories, metabolic function, microbiome. It’s still always about stress management and feeling connected to somebody no matter what. And I think in this day and age, people are feeling more and more isolated. So, reach out. I know it’s uncomfortable but keep reaching out. Another favorite guest, who’s one of my favorite people is Byron Katie.

    It was. important for me. Katie has helped me a lot in my life and the struggles that I’ve had we’ve gone through some things as a family. but I will say if you don’t know about the work by Byron Katie, it’s really about self-inquiry. So, is it true? Can I know it to be true for sure? Who am I when I think those thoughts and who would I be without that belief? And within the work, they have all kinds of exercises and you write it all down. And you do things called the turnarounds. This has been one of the most helpful tools for me, period. As a parent, as a wife in business. And we always say, what would you tell your younger self? It’s oh, I’d say don’t take it so personal.

    And I think when you can practice the work and practice self-inquiry. We realize how much we live in the stories in our head and I’m, fighting that all the time. And so, I just want to highlight that show or that program because it could be great going into the new year just having that in your mind as a go to. It’s not about getting it right or perfect. It’s about having a resource or the consciousness to go. Oh wait. I think I’m in a story right now and How do I maybe get out of this? And so, I just want to talk about Byron Katie, the work for people interested in hormone health. I did a male show with Dr.

    Kyle Gillette and I did a women’s health one with Dr. Mary Claire Haver. And it’s just this idea too that, and Dr. Michael Greger talks about this, that sometimes we go through all of these things chalks it up to like age or my genetics. And certainly, you’ve heard enough about epigenetics where it’s really just turning off and on certain switches with our lifestyle, but that it is in our sentence, like we don’t have to suffer through different phases and changes.

    [00:21:26] Gabby Reece: We can be proactive in supporting our health, whether it’s changing our nutrition or when we go to sleep. Or even, Dr. Mary Clare Haver will talk about, hormone therapy for going through menopause. So, I just want to encourage you if, you’ve been going through some things that we don’t have to suffer and don’t buy into I’m in my thirties now.

    I’m in my forties. I’m in my fifties. It’s total bullshit. Yes, aging is inevitable and certain things are easier in your twenties, but I don’t think that suffering or high suffering has to be part of it. So, I just want to encourage you there. I did a beautiful podcast with Susan Casey. She wrote a book called the underworld. And I, the book is extraordinary. And her conversation is just a. Really thoughtful and Susan’s a really intelligent, adventurous, wonderful author. And if you did not hear the one with Susan Casey about the underworld, I really encourage you. And sorry, going back to the hormone, Dr. Sarah Hill.

    So, if you’re female or you have a daughter and there’s consideration around birth control, what are your real options? What are the long term effects? And, she’s really helpful in that. Brain health, a lot of people, if they’re dealing with a parent or a family member with Alzheimer’s or dementia, Dr.

    Dale Bredesen is a great resource for what treatments are out there, what we can do now, how we can prevent certain things, and if somebody’s already been diagnosed I. I find him to be a really powerful resource and the only reason I’m bringing up is because I talk to people all the time that they know somebody or they’re navigating it with somebody in their family. So, I want to highlight Dr. Dale Bredesen. For your gut health, Dr. Ben Bickman. Ben’s just great. He’s clear. He’s concise. He’s a little bit harsh. And if you haven’t been introduced to his work, I want to highlight Dr. Bickman on the podcast. I think he just does it. Really great and clear job. And finally, on the shows from 2023 is a very serious and heavy podcast.

    I did with Colin Campbell. He wrote a book called finding the words and it’s an important book and it’s an important conversation because Colin and his wife were driving in their vehicle with their two teenage children, one son, one daughter, and they were hit by a drunk and drugged driver who killed his children and he won’t, he doesn’t call it an accident.

    He’s this could have been avoided. So, he wrote this extraordinary book about going through the experience. So, he. He talks, he maps it out for the griever who’s gone through great loss down things like your neighbor comes over, they want to take away your pain, they’re really uncomfortable. So, they say something like, yeah, I know what it must be like because of my mother, I just lost her at 102.

    It’s like people say really weird and uncomfortable things in an effort to take away someone else’s grief. So, he writes a roadmap. About all the feelings, all of them about going through loss and then even gives the people who are trying to support the grievers things like, hey, listen, invite me for a walk.

    But when the moment comes, you could invite me on a Tuesday, but when Wednesday comes, maybe I don’t feel like going, but he’s don’t stop inviting me. So, he gives it from his point of view as somebody who has had the loss, but he also supports the people who really want to be helpful in a real way to somebody going through this. So, I highly suggest Colin Campbell’s finding the way its mind blowing his ability. To be so direct about his experience and capture it in words I think is really a beautiful tool to help so many people who are going through that and this idea that especially loss of a child, like you don’t get over that.

    So that’s not what the goal is, right? It’s how do you, how does it get better? How does. How do you go through holidays? How do you navigate birthdays? And he’s just really helpful. And finally, I this is uncomfortable, but I have a friend who had a long, he was diagnosed many years ago with cancer, with leukemia, and he just passed away last week.

    Young father of three sons, his wife is my very dear friend and what it, I know that we know this, and we go through it every single time. It’s hey, life is short. What am I holding back on? Why am I not going for it more? Why am I afraid? It’s all those things that get put into crystallized focus when somebody, especially when they’re younger passes away.

    And all like the things that we’re waiting for and then we realize no, this is so precious. Sorry.

    [00:27:13] Gabby Reece: So, going forward in 2024 it still is the same thing that I want to talk about on this show, which is in order for me to have that perspective as often as possible, I need to try to take care of myself and I need to, if I have old patterns from childhood or whatever, confront those. It’s scary and it’s okay, even if they’re really ugly.

    It’s okay because Your precious life yours it is yours to be joyous about and yours to live But it’s also the responsibility on us to contribute and I think we have a better chance of doing that to be of service Which is where the real goods is anyway because it is precious and, having my friend Travis pass away, it’s I don’t want to have those things happen to remind me how can I really show up right now, even when everything is great to have the awareness, not the urgency, not we’re paranoia, but just the consciousness that.

    It is a gift and what do you want to do with that gift and how do you want to contribute that gift to the world? Because we all have one and again, it doesn’t have to be grand. It can be those little exchanges every day with people. Those mean a lot to people. And so, going into 2024, Laird’s motto every year in the new year is laugh more and have more fun.

    And I think there’s something to be said for definitely making that wrapping all of the goals into this idea of playing more of being more joyous. It is very hard for me to do. I am ultimately so serious minded and measured and all of these things, but. I’m going to continue working on it. And finally, I, you will see that we will change the show in the new year and it will become the long game with me because I’m not a hooky and do these three things and how to lose weight in five days and all this stuff, I just, I’ve been, maybe I’d just been around a minute and I just know that’s.

    And I understand the value of that because it gets people like I’m at an impulse. I want to check that out, but everything I want to talk about, it’s like, whether it’s your health, your relationships, your businesses whatever it is, I look at everything as a long game. So, what choices and decisions and things can I do today that feed into this long game? Having said that, it doesn’t mean you’re not going to have You know, four or five different chapters of your occupation. I don’t mean staying in everything forever. It doesn’t mean that you’re going to be in one relationship or one marriage. That’s not what I mean. I just mean feeding the long game. And so, I want to share with you that I’m doing that just to make it really clear.

    What is the show about? What are the conversations about? And it’s just tools to help us play that long game a little easier with a little more strategy or just, guides, cause it’s hard and it’s confusing and overwhelming and I don’t think that’s getting easier. So, with that, I wish you a Merry Christmas and I will see you.

    In the new year and I wish you, I, do you remember when 2020 you came and you’re like, Oh, 2020, we’ll have 2020 vision. And then all hell broke loose. I hope that we can all participate in being part of making it a better place. So, your home, your block, your community, your state, your country, whatever your planet, just.

    Make that part of the goal too. And from me to you, I wish you so much health and love. And I thank you for joining me on any and all of these podcasts. And I hope that they bring value. To you in some way, small or large. Thank you for listening to this week’s episode. If you want to learn more, there is a ton of valuable information on my website. All you have to do is go to gabrielle or head to the episode show notes to find a full breakdown with helpful links to studies, research, books, podcasts, and so much more. If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out and send them to at Gabby Reese on Instagram. And if you feel inspired, please subscribe. I’ll see you next week.

About Gabby Reece 

Gabrielle Reece is not only a volleyball legend, but an inspirational health and fitness leader, podcast host, corporate speaker, New York Times bestselling author, wife, and mother. The former professional beach volleyball player and Nike’s first female spokeswoman is the definition of both athleticism and beauty. Gabby is a force to be reckoned with in the gym and on a microphone.

She has regularly appeared on Good Morning AmericaThe Today Show, the Ellen Degeneres Show, and Chelsea Lately, as well as other top-tier entertainment shows. She has also appeared in several feature films, where she played a pro beach volleyball player in ‘Cloud Nine’ with Bert Reynolds (2004), a guest star in ‘North Shore’ (2004), and as a physical trainer in the film ‘Gattica’ (1997).

A charismatic speaker, in the spring of 2012, Gabby was invited to Washington, DC to speak at the annual TEDMED conference on innovations in health and medicine. Gabby also has an ongoing relationship with the American Heart Association Teaching Gardens, an initiative benefitting needy schools through the planting of organic gardens, by which she speaks to children about the importance of eating healthy and regular exercise.

Gabby won an athletic scholarship to Florida State University for indoor volleyball where she played two seasons before accepting offers from the modeling world. Despite the demand of modeling and competing, Gabby set two school volleyball records for FSU that still stand today.

A Florida State star turned pro, Gabby trained hard to hone her skills in 2-person beach volleyball and competed domestically in the 1999-2000 Olympic 4 on 4 Challenge Series and the 1999-2000 FIVB Beach Volleyball World Tour. In 1997, competing with the best global beach volleyball players ever assembled, Gabby’s 4-person team took first place at the first-ever Beach Volleyball World Championships. 1997 was Gabby’s fifth season as team captain in the 4-person Women’s Beach Volleyball League (WBVL), and her fourth captaining Team Nike.

Named the Offensive Player of the Year in 1994-95 and WBVL blocks leader, Gabby led the WBVL in kills four straight years in a row from 1993-1996. In 1994 Gabby became Nike’s first female athlete to design a shoe, and Nike’s first-ever female cross-training spokesperson. Working with Tinker Hatfield, designer of the Air Jordan, Nike first launched Gabby’s shoe the Air Trainer, then the Air Patrol in 1995, the Air GR in 1997 and the Air GR II in 1998, and her shoe eventually became the first women’s shoe to outsell the Air Jordan.

Gabby married the love of her life big wave surfer and waterman Laird Hamilton in 1997. They have 3 children (2 together) and reside in Kauai, HI and Malibu, CA. Gabby was born in Southern California and was raised in New York, St Thomas, and Florida. From the ages of 2-7 Gabby lived with family friends in Long Island New York. She then reunited with her mother and moved to St Thomas until her teenage years. She spent her high school years in Florida and was introduced to sports in the 11th grade. Gabby’s father died in a plane crash when she was 4 years old.